31 May 2010

Bicycle Culture Theme Park


Get yer driving gloves ready, Ferrari World opens this October in Abu Dhabi. A massive theme park dedicated to the Italian carmaker. Featuring, among other things, the world's fastest roller coaster, Formula Rossa. Safety goggles are a must - 'it's that fast' they say.

Funny... Batavus World doesn't have quite the same ring to it, does it? :-)

But hey, we could just cover Amsterdam and Copenhagen in massive, climate-controlled domes and open two theme parks called Bicycle Culture World! It'll be a fietsfest! Cykeltastic! We'll hire Holger to supervise the covering of the streets.

I wouldn't mind. You'd have to park on the outskirts of the city and ride bicycles all around. Maybe we could put the parking lot on the Bicycle Island off the coast of the city.

It would one big Tommorrowland.

Maybe in Yesterdayland kids can try those old-fashioned car thingys and giggle about how 'totally weird' it must have been to have these things in city centres.

Pushin It
Ooh! Ooh! Be sure to try the Wind in Your Hair roller coaster, powered by a combination of wind turbines and human-powered stationary bikes. You sit in a cargo bike box and whee!
Christmas Tree Batteries

Then buy your kids balloon animals made out of bicycle tubes. The little ones can enjoy a spin on the Squeaky Chain ferris wheel.

Fruitbike Copenhagen Crepes City Hall Square
All the food and drinks would be served off of bicycles.
Espressomanden

All the hotels would have beds made out of big ol' cargo bikes:
Bike Bed

Come on, people... let's brainstorm. What other attractions could Bicycle Culture World offer?

3 comments:

Klaus Mohn said...

I'd like to see a red-lights ride, where you ride your bike on a street with no bicycle green wave and wonder why on earth traffic lights should be timed for the road users who do the most damage to their surroundings, with their big metal boxes.

Anonymous said...

Well, covering the cities with domes would take away a big part of the 'real' feeling, wouldn't it?

Or do you think 'climate control' should add some rain and wind in case nature provides sunshine?

spacemodular said...

Have you not heard of Kona Bike Parks?

http://www.konabikeworld.com/08_bikeparks_index.htm